The Crash & Burn Tournament

**knightrous** · 15th April 2006, 21:04

It all started along time ago, so long ago, it was Monday... I was in doing a bit of shopping, getting some more slabs of coke... Its for my addiction you see. And I must have taken like a wrong turn at the food deli and I ended up in the cold food section, and it was basically empty, there were no other people...

I wondered, WOW! Wouldnt it be soo coool if there was an underground street racing syndicate of souped up, blingin trolley racers in the cold food section.... Maybe shopping would be half interesting with two trolleys doing burn outs down the aisle with large Nitrous Oxide tanks giving hardcore performance...

So in my usual act of randomness, I yelled down the aisle, Aisle 12 is now closed.... FOR BURNOUTS! before proceeding to race my trolley as fast as possible down the aisle.... **I swear they are gonna kick me out of there someday, my trolley wasnt even registered**

I did a quick tough lap with my trolley, scaring an old lady in the process and headed to the checkouts...

Now the reason it became Checkouts 5 & 6 will be closed today.... FOR BURNOUTS!!!! was because when I was explaining the story to some of my mates, trying to get them to join the fully sik underground world of shopping trolley racing, the influence of alcohol magically made me say checkouts instead of aisle... Since then, the random saying has stuck...

The moral of this story? Dont leave things in the fridge!

**Queues There something in the fridge tonight by Wierd Al and adds the Cowboy Bebop video clip before departing off to the House of Carnage robot event....**

**bex** · 15th April 2006, 21:09

Ahhh makes a bit of sense but I guess its a you need to be there to find it funny sorta thing

**kodster** · 17th April 2006, 14:14

Again, sorry, for the delayâ‚¬Â¦you didnt think the tournament stopped at Heat A, did you?! Shame on you!

Were onto Heat B now, and the action seems to intensify. Todays fight featuresâ‚¬Â¦

LEPROSY INFECTION, a robot shaped like Tetanus Booster from Series 7; an invertible vapourbot with bars on the sides to prevent being stuck on its sides, and a vicious spinning drum in front. However, though the wheels are semi-protected, they are still vulnerable to axes. Chris neednt worry about the wheels, though. Leprosys opponent isâ‚¬Â¦

WEDGE DEVOLUTION, a very well known vapourbot on this forum. A low wedge with steep sides and rear (and skirts over top), it sports a nasty rear-hinged flipper capable of easily lifting a tonne. It has a front plate that makes it easier to get under robots with skirts. However, it has limited CO2 capacityâ‚¬Â¦

Roboteers, stand byâ‚¬Â¦

House robots: Sir Killalot, Mr. Psycho

3â‚¬Â¦
2â‚¬Â¦
1â‚¬Â¦
ACTIVATE!

Wedge Devo is already blasting towards Leprosy - WHOA! Caught you off-guard, there, didnt it, Steve? The drum had already got up to speed, and sent Wedge Devo flying onto its tipâ‚¬Â¦and comes right back down on top of Leprosy, who advances, and shoves Wedge Devo right into the wall. Leprosy turns and, trying to get its spinning drum into the wheels of its enemy, drives forward a little bit, manoeuvring around trying to get the precise motion - and no, Wedge Devo slides off of Leprosy and bolts away, happy to be free.

Leprosy looks in a right state after that, and bores at Wedge Devo, hoping to toss it over with a good solid hit. But Steve disallows the chance as Wedge Devo makes a reverse 90 on one wheel, and Leprosy goes sailing past. Wedge Devo then slides under the drummer and WHOOSH! Leprosy is sent spinning into the air, and lands back down on Wedges flipper, and again gets launched! Not the flight plan Chris was intending!

Leprosy has now landed behind Wedge Devo, and trying to take advantage of this charges at Wedges rear. Wedge Devo turns, but too late; the drum hits the side and Wedge Devo is thrown up onto Leprosy again, with the side skirt gone, and uh-oh! Leprosys heading for Sir Killalots CPZ! At the last second, Wedge Devo reverses off of Leprosy, and gets under him again, tossing him about Â¼ way across the arena! What a back and forth match this is! Refbot looks on as Wedge Devo chases Leprosy down and gets under Leprosy, but too late, as Leprosy speeds off, and all the use of that flip is put to naught, as Wedge Devo hits air. Leprosy spins around and charges again at Wedge Devo, but no, the flipper closes too fast, and Leprosy drives straight onto it. A grin unfurls on Steves face as the flipper yet again activates andâ‚¬Â¦I daresay the flying sickness that Leprosy is feeling is showing in Chris face: hes starting to turn green himself.

Leprosy lands near the floor flipper, and is rammed by Wedge Devo again, being shoved on top of Wedge Devo and sent across the arena again! Leprosy lands inverted this time, but being invertible this doesnt matter. Wedge Devo bores at Leprosy again, but this time the drum catches the flipper. Wedge Devo is driven into the ground, and Leprosy flings himself into the air from the hit, but something has happened, because Leprosy has started to smoke. Wedge Devo senses that this match has drawn to a close and so advances on Leprosy again, who is not showing any signs of life other than the drum spinning. WHAM! The flipper again is caught by the drum, and Wedge Devo cushions the blow into the ground using his wheels. Leprosy, however, is not moving at all; the drum has stopped completely. Wedge Devo reverses all the way across the arena into the pit release, opening the pit, but Sir Killalot and Mr. Psycho have blocked off Leprosy from Wedge, and Refbot is counting Leprosy out.
1â‚¬Â¦2â‚¬Â¦3â‚¬Â¦4â‚¬Â¦5� �‚¬Â¦6â‚¬Â¦7â‚¬Â¦8â‚¬Â¦9â� ��¬Â¦10!
Mr. Psycho advances, lowering the hammer, and poor Leprosy is feeling the wrath of the house robots now, as Sir Killalot grips him with the Jaws of Life - WHATS THIS?! Wedge Devo has gotten under Sir Killalot and thrown him onto his face?! Uh oh, Mr. Psycho doesnt look too happy as he advances on Wedge Devo, but Steve gives Psycho the oh please look as Wedge lets Psycho advance. And over Mr. Psycho goes at the tip of the flipper. Leprosy has been dropped as Sir Killalot rams Wedge Devo from behind. Wedge Devo turns and flips Sir Killalot again, but now smoke from Wedge is emanatingâ‚¬Â¦Refbot shoves Leprosy down the pit.

CEASE!

The cure for Leprosy Infection has been found.
ITS WEDGE DEVOLUTION, AND HE ADVANCES TO ROUND 2!!!

Coming up: Son of Ripper 5.0 VS. Enter the May Tracks

**pcbore** · 17th April 2006, 16:03

Coming up: Son of Ripper 5.0 VS. Enter the May Tracks

Correction. Its Son of Ripper 5.0 vs Enter the May Tracks vs the house robots

**kodster** · 19th April 2006, 11:38

Well, time for another fight. Two veterans, three more spots in Round 2, who will get the next place? One of these two willâ‚¬Â¦

SON OF RIPPER 5.0, with its box-no-wheels design, with sloped sides and front wedge. It has a Firestorm-style wedge extender, which on top is a nasty rear-hinged CO2-powered flipping arm that runs across the top and front of the robot. Also it has a rear horizontal Hardox spinning bar. Also invertible, with good armour, and good speed, it should stack up well againstâ‚¬Â¦

ENTER THE MAY TRACKS, a Comengetorix shape with a bigger wedge than Comengetorix, and 20mph speed. It sports a front flipper with a recycling system, so it has unlimited firepower, and can prevent robots from going right over the top due to sunglasses at the top (sunglassesâ‚¬Â¦?). It has 3.25mm hardox armour, and is a tracked robot. However, it is not invertibleâ‚¬Â¦

Roboteers, stand byâ‚¬Â¦

The house robots, thanks to Andy and Frank, are Matilda and Growler.

3â‚¬Â¦
2â‚¬Â¦
1â‚¬Â¦
ACTIVATE!

And so Andy and Frank have decided to take on the house robots before they start on each other! Matilda has started with the disc pointed at the opponents, and is reversing into Enter the May Tracks. EtMT isnt phased by this, and so bores full out on Matilda.
CRASH!
OUCH! Not a wise decision, as EtMT goes flying into a 360 and lands right back into its wheels, the flipper not really damaged, though. SoR goes flying into Matildas side and inverts her. Growler rams SoR from the side, getting under the skirts and clamping down, removing the side skirt. EtMT rushes in and tosses over Growler, from the side also. Now with the house robots out of the way - no? Oh, there goes Matilda OOTA courtesy of SoR!

EtMT opens the pit and pushes Growler towards it. SoR turns, and joins EtMT in the pushing of Growler into the pit. Yup, down he goes, straight into the pit of doom! Now that the battle with the house robots IS over, Andy and Franks bots turn and face each other. Thenâ‚¬Â¦they charge. And SoR goes flying onto the wedge of EtMT and gets launched across the arena. He lands upside-down and uses the arm to right himself, but right on top of EtMT again, who tracked down SoR, and launches him again. SoR bounces off the arena wall and lands right-side-upâ‚¬Â¦and EtMT gets under himâ‚¬Â¦and bye-bye, Son of Ripper, its OOTA for you!

CEASE!

Son of Ripper 5.0 gets sent out early. Quickly. Literally.

ENTER THE MAY TRACKS ADVANCES TO ROUND 2!

Coming up: Ripper VS. Terrorhurtz

**majinb** · 19th April 2006, 11:49

interesting fight Kody

Ripper VS. Terrorhurtz

as a matter of coincidence, I just saw some action pics of Ripper (for the first time), making me say Terrorhurtzll win

**kodster** · 19th April 2006, 11:53

Does anyone have any pics of Ripper? Im not quite sure what it looks like...all I know is that its got a flipper, and it beat the crap out of the HBs (having read the TV Archives)