Swannys Bar

[swanaldo]

a zebra...lol.....lol.....

[swanaldo]

no.....really.....you dont have to.....oh thanks.

[bex]

Dont worry we didnt

[geoff]

Talking of zebras...
These two zebras are standing around on the Serengeti in Africa discussing one of the major problems that have troubled their species since time immamorial... Are we white with black stripes or black with white stripes?
so one zebra says to the other look, the only way weer going to get to the bottem of this one is to ask the almighty. So the first zebra lifts his head skyward and says Please lord can you answer this problem... Are we white with black stripes or are we black with white stripes? ....After a couple of moments a loud booming voice comes down from on high and says YOU ARE WHAT YOU ARE ...There you go says one zebra Conclusive proof that we are white with black stripes ...how did you work that out asks the other zebra... very simple says the first zebra... If we had been black with white stripes he would have said... YA IS WHAT YA IS!!!

Dont blame me ....Dr Rex Garrod told me that one last weekend!!

[stu]

Yeah i got that one as well. LOL! Also..

he said My dad was a boxer, my mum was a b*tch, so they called me Rex.

Mr Stu

[bex]

Ah why not...

Theres three men at a christmas chess conference and they are discussing recent victories in the hotel lobby when the manager came out and asked them to leave, when asked why he responded because i cant stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer

[RogueTwoRobots]

Oooh dear - they get worse every year

The jokes from our Christmas Crackers this year were so bad I cant remember any of them - but rest assured that when I do, I shall post them here to make everyone suffer mwuhahahaha

[kodster]

Not if the profanity checker has anything to say about it

Unless theyve got no profanity in them

[swanaldo]

my missus went mad yeaterday when i took the kitchen clock off the wall and replaced it with a sheet of kp peanuts so i can just nip in there and eat 1 small bag at a time instead eating loads. just for christmas that is. i said she could have a sheet of bacon fries or scampi fries but there was no reply. i might have to take them to the local where they belong.

[kane]

How about get a pump installed on the counter and bring the local to yours!