Okay, more fights!

A hippopotamus vs. Diamond Sparkle Super Pretzel

House fighter is The Watcher.

The hippo charges at high speed but trips over the super pretzel and falls on its arse. The pretzel itself goes flying to the edge of the arena and wobbles a little on the edge. The hippo loses track of where the pretzel went to due to its incredibly abysmal eyesight and figures that its mutated into a statue, which is ironically The Watcher. Immediately, before the hippo gets thought of what to do, the house fighter lets out a cry from its three-vulture heads, and the other house fighters pounce. Its Ancalagon who makes the first move by ramming the hippo whiles the hippo confronts Ancalagon with a charge of his own. Unfortunately for the poor hippo, the dragons might is far too great to overcome physically and the hippo is jolted all the way to the opposite side of the arena as the pretzel. Asterix then suddenly realizes something and turns around to alert the other house fighters that this is a rare endangered hippo, the last of its kind. So of course the first thing is sees is Taki, Tira, and Hamlet dismantling the beast and lopping off its head. But what the hippo lacks in eyesight it greatly makes up for in IQ, for this hippo in particular was the smartest ever. Therefore it was able to make a dummy of itself in which the house fighters fell to spoil and have ripped apart, and once again searches for the pretzel. Then out of nowhere Ancalagon tackles the hippo in rage. The hippo lands on the pretzel with a thud. Normally this would not have mattered since the pretzel is made of diamonds but the hippos weight causes the pretzel to crumble from the inside, and it implodes into diamonds. Cortez grabs these and adds them to his secret hoard...under the arena.

A hippopotamus advances to Round 2!

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And now we let the ferret Kiki out of prison to fight another Insane Clown Posse member.

Shaggy 2 Dope vs. Kiki

House fighters are Obelix and Ancalagon.

Shaggy runs over to the ferret and tries to stomp on her but shes too fast and is able to dodge the foot, which craters the ground around it. She then tries biting into the foot but Shaggy luckily placed on steel-toe boots and therefore poor Kikis teeth crumble. She whimpers and runs to the other end of the arena. Unfortunately thats where Ancalagon is, and he stomps down even harder, and Kiki squeals and runs around in circles. Shaggy laughs, taking out a pair of Uzis and blasting away. Luckily Kiki hid behind Obelix and Obelix is much kinder to animals than Ancalagon is. The bullets just bounce off of Obelixs enormous girth and Obelix gets angry. Shaggy isnt fazed but going over to the gargantuan gaul he lands a solid right fist at Obelixs face which never gets there due to the fact that Obelix stopped it. In swift motion Obelix breaks Shaggys arm and pounds him over the head with his menhir. Shaggy keels over but manages to stay conscious...for about 2 more seconds, as Ancalagon himself comes over and body slams the freak into the ground and torches himself completely. Just as soon as thats done, a bald worker with a moustache from that Looney Tunes episode comes into the arena with a can of cement and pours it over Shaggy, covering him, and then begins to pave it. Kiki, Obelix, and Ancalagon blink in confusion.

Kiki advances to Round 2!

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9,000,000 Bicycles vs. Master Hand

House fighters are Tira & Hamlet.

The bicycles swarm the arena and immediately stop. Suddenly there is an evil laugh, and a HUGE floating white glove comes down to meet them. Tira has heard of the tales of this evil being, and clenches her teeth, but Hamlet has not, and gives a laugh...and is toasted by some Bombshell Bills that Master Hand fires at him moments later. The bicycles cant do anything as Master Hand begins to smite them off the platform in broken pieces and flaming objects. Suddenly, Martijn stands up from the audience and says something that sounds like a spell in Dutch. Suddenly rocket-packs appear on the seats of the bicycles, and Master Hand recoils a bit. Suddenly for the third time...the bicycles rise into the air and charge Master Hand. Master Hand vanishes, appears in the background and punches off half of the remaining bicycles. But he loses about 200 health due to the charge. The bicycles turn about and charge again. Immediately, Master Hand summons his brother, Crazy Hand, who joins him in the battle, but Exa-Gore-Ic also appears and reminds Master Hand that he cant summon something of equal power or more powerful than him, and implodes Crazy Hand. Due to this distraction, the last of Master Hands health is drained but due to Master Hand nicking an Action Replay from a store, he gives himself 500 more health and 11 lives, because infinite would be way too overkill. The bicycles regroup and charge again but Master Hand rockets into them and blows them to smithereens in a single explosion connected with many smaller ones. Martijn scats away before the smell of burning rubber finds its way under his nose. Master Hand somehow is able to laugh, and suddenly snares Tira and vanishes. Lord DoomForAll vanishes as well to rescue her for reasons unknown and he and Master Hand have a huge interdimensional fight in which DoomForAll wins but lets Master Hand live for his next fight...

Master Hand advances to Round 2!