Team Gore Presents: ATTTWI

[majinb]

Zinedine Zidane vs. Mugen

Tactics: a well-placed headbutt in the chest should do the job

[darkguru]

Chastity Dingle vs Google

Seeing as i told you to google her, ill have her use all of her links to defeat google from the inside

Ok, so i was kidding.

Chastity - Pure, innocent.
Dingle family - The biggest bunch of petty crooks in the county

I want to use the irony to try and explode google If that dont work...she has a mean right hook...

And if that dont work, i go with my original jokey idea

[kane]

Keep the fighting clean guys!

[kodster]

And the Wars Incarnate was? :S

[kodster]

My last post got DELETED by Refbot (shoves him down the pit :P) so I re-did it...curse this, its not going to be good as Alexs now...CURSE YOU REFBOT!!! (j/k)

Anyway, here we go!

Riff vs. Foxpig

House fighters are Asterix and Obelix.

Riff walks onto the huge arena platform that is the Final Destination. At the end of the arena he sees an organism made up of half a fox, and half a pig. The foxpig really didnt want to be turned into what he is right now. The fox part of him wanted to forage for scraps in his home, wherever that may be, and the pig part of him was building a nuclear missile to kill the big bad wolf and rescue his poor pig brothers. Riff of course knows nothing of this; hes already holding up a gigantic laser and with a mad cackle fires it right at the hybrid. The foxpig barely dodges it, the halves of the weird creature debating in their minds which part of their body one half the mind can control. The fox agrees to use the head and tail, while the pig agrees to use the rest. The hybrid leaps at Riff and tackles him in the chest, knocking the mad scientist off his feet. Riff already had fired the laser and it hits Obelix in the face. Unfortunately due to the strength and girth of the gaul this hardly tickles him. Asterix doesnt like this one bit, and leaps into the fight. Being friendly with animals and all gentle organisms he gives little heed to the foxpig and starts to repeatedly bash Riff with his fists. Obelix looks at this mildly interesting turn of events and decides to help his buddy whiles the foxpig watches this. Both Asterix and Obelix are now pummeling the daylights out of Riff, who lays on the floor in a mess. The foxpig trots away, impressed that he really didnt have to do much to defeat his opponent.

Foxpig advances to Round 2!

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Seong Mi-Na vs. Trogdor the Burninator

House fighters are Taki and Tira.

Seong Mi-Na glares at the house fighters for taking up with that idiot who made the tourney; what she wouldnt give to give them a good kick up the...yeah, well...turning away, she looks up...almost tilting her head up about 90 degrees, to look at a dragon nearly 100 feet tall, with stick legs, an S-shaped body, and a big, human-like muscular arm on its back. Mina readies Scarlet Thunder, possibly thinking of chopping off Trogdors wimpy legs. Unfortunately, its pretty hard to do that when the dragons head is in front of you. Trogdor gives a roar and blasts Mina with a ball of fire, burninating her. Mina screams and drops to the ground, engulfed in flame. Trogdor grins evilly at the fire, and commences to blare out a mighty roar. Suddenly, the ball of fire goes black, and Trogdor stops mid-roar, looking confused. The fire dissipates, and Mina is standing there, her eyes glowing red, the elegant ponytail loosed as her hair flows all about her. Trogdor realizes his mistake; Seong Mi-Na must be the Phoenix, a powerful entity bent on fiery destruction, and had been even more fueled by the fire. He goes to smash her with his tail but Mina raises a hand and points at Trogdor. Trogdors head starts to burn hellishly hot, and he stops in his tracks, writhing around in agony. Taki panicks, gets out a cellphone and calls ALARMFORCE right away. Several people with white suits and shiny badges come in, coat the arena with hardox, and place force fields around the two house fighters, which then burst into digital firewalls. Taki then smirks to herself, and she and Tira pull out shades and put them on, safe behind their firewalls. While this was going on, Mina had been summoning enough power, and her hands were glowing with intensity. Trogdor lurches forward with his muscular arm and grabs her. Just as he is about to devour her, she lets out a blast of heat and energy that incinerated Trogdor instantly, and the dragon never has a chance to scream as his molecules are scattered and sucked up by a black hole waiting nearby. Taki and Tira take their shades off as the now back-to-normal Seong Mi-Na collapses to the floor from energy loss. From the audience we can see the figure of Strong Bad running off, sobbing hysterically.

Seong Mi-Na advances to Round 2!

----

A bowl of custard vs. Evil Mighty Morphin Green Ranger

House fighter is The Watcher.

The Power Ranger stares at his opponent, a bowl of custard. How low of a victory this is...he kicks the bowl of custard over and walks away. Suddenly there is a weird squelching sound and the Green Rangers attention is drawn to what should have been an inanimate object behind him.
The custard is swirling and bubbling; curls of steam are rising off of it. As the Ranger stares, the pool of custard rises and splats itself onto the Ranger. The Ranger falls to the ground, yelling in pain, as the custard covers him and begins to boil more rapidly than ever. The Green Ranger takes out his dragon shield and throws the custard off of him. The custard swarms into a pool once more, and suddenly rises up off the floor and forms a giant monster made of custard, troll-like in form and oozing its substance all over the arena. The Ranger takes out his sword and slices the monster in the arm but the custard just reseals back onto the arm. The monster grabs the Ranger and prepares to swallow him whole but then the Ranger pulls out his dragon orb, a potent device full of magic and energy. He plants it inside the monster chest, and five seconds later the monster explodes from the inside, spraying away the Ranger and knocking him out cold. Luckily for the custard none of it was harmed and so it refills back into the bowl.

A Bowl of Custard advances to Round 2!

More fights up soon!

[pcbore]

Is Asterix nice to animals before or after he beats wild boar to death with his bare hands?

[alex_holt]

Yay! Go Foxpig!

But the irony of Trogdor getting burninated himself.....

[kodster]

As long as he gets his share of boar, hes nice to other animals, Frank. Boars to Asterix are like cows to us...except the gauls dont drink boar milk. :wink:

Lets go!

Zinedine Zidane vs. Mugen

House fighters are Hamlet and Big Mac.

Zidane charges at Mugen but Mugen sidesteps and takes a slash at Zidanes back, but misses due to the speed of the charge. Zidane takes out a football (thats soccer ball for Americans) and kicks it at Mugens head. Mugen easily slices it up and runs at Zidane with his double-edged blade.
However, the football that Mugen had sliced was in fact one of the new one-of-a-kind Team Geist balls that was coloured gold and silver all over. Even though Mugen disregarded this completely, he still shouldve kept his guard up from behind as hundreds of Europian football officials now swarm the arena and jump on top of the samurai. Mugen tries in vain to resist the charges on him of destroying FIFA property and finally falls beneath the army of officials who attempt to drag him away for 50 years. Fortunately Mugen breaks free of them...and walks right into a headbutt from Zidane who went unnoticed during this scuffle. He plops to the floor dazed. The officials turn on Zidane but Zidane points out that Mugen was, in fact, not an official football player nor will he ever be one. Mugen is getting desperate, and he needs energy...he sees a burger on the side of the arena, looking very lonely. He grabs the burger and scarfs it down. Unfortunately the thing he just ate was in fact the house fighter, Big Mac. Suddenly a figure falls from the sky and lands on Mugen, knocking him out. Its Marco Materazzi. Zidane headbutts him too and receives a suspension. Hamlet scratches his head and begins to quote himself from his play, but a random audience member throws an ugly mug at Hamlet, kncoking him out too.

Zinedine Zidane advances to Round 2!

EDIT: Now would be the time for you to give a description of XS3, Mark, since Xs fight with Bender is next. :wink:

(Message edited by kodster on February 12, 2007)