Heat B
Round 1
Mobile Failure 2.5 vs. Last Rites vs. Black Panther vs. Mr. Death


Mobile Failure 2.5 is anything but! Perhaps the name refers to its opponents' state post-match. Tracy Farber's robot has some decent armour backed up with a hinged front wedge, side skirts, and rear scoop, and a hugely powerful pneumatic axe. Nothing to write home about, really, it's a good all-rounder.
Mini-Tourn History:
MT4: Got knocked out in Round 2 by Empty Inside.


Where Last Rites enters the arena, destruction is sure to follow. With a 34kg spinning bar going at 2200rpm, and powered by two ETEKs, hardly anything will survive a decent hit. He also had 2WD for better turning, but beyond that there's little else. If you stop the bar, he's completely vulnerable, and that might not do him much good in a melee...
Mini-Tourn History: None


Black Panther is on the prowl with its scoopy flipper and decently-powerful axe. An interesting feature is the 3cm of titanium foam behind the frontal 7mm Titanium armour, serving as a mesh for opponents to lodge their weapons in and get stuck. He's mildly nippy at 22mph, but he won't push worth a darn.
Mini-Tourn History: None


While not the most threatening-sounding of the four, Mr. Death will be hard to kill with the toughest armour of the bunch with 6mm Ti/V, even the skirts. He even has decent power, but 24mph may be a little uncontrollable. Plus, he has no damaging weaponry. But as the saying goes, "Nobody beats The Brick!"
Mini-Tourn History: None


Roboteers, stand by...


House robots: Teresa, Count Bleck


3...
2...
1...
ACTIVATE!


So we begin with Mobile Failure and Mr. Death racing right at one another! No kidding! They crash together, and Mr. Death's skirts win out... only for Mobile Failure's wedge to travel up it and hit the front! So nobody gains anything from this situation! ...or do they? Mobile Failure is quickly gaining around, as its drivetrain has more torque than its oppressor, and allows it to shove Mr. Death backwards, but not without a struggle! They both dig into the ground, with Tracy ever so slowly pushing Mr. Death back... and this allows Last Rites to barge in! CRAAAAASH!!! Obviously Last Rites wanted to try and hit him both at the same time, but all he got was Mr. Death's skirt... which is completely gone! The skirt itself, now about 25 feet away, is actually relatively fine, save for a dent, but the connecting bit looks completely mangled! Talk about power! And talk about gyroscopes! Last Rites is doing a crazy dance in the middle of the floor... now balancing on one wheel, now landing onto its back, its blade stopped! And now Black Panther makes itself known, flying right in before the heavy spinner can spin back up, and down comes the axe! Smack, smack, smack! Repeated are the blows, and there are now several scars in the Last Rites' armour. They can't get away... or is that even possible? I don't see the wheels moving... blimey! Are they already out?! Alex Holt seems to realize it as well, because Black Panther has backed off... no, no Last Rites is not mobile at all! What a disappointing end for the famed heavyweight spinner! The Watcher creeps up on them while they're not expecting it...
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10!


And we're already down to three! Meanwhile, the pushing match between Tracy and playzooki is still going on. Tracy finally fires the axe, but it hardly makes a dent in the armour. More importantly, it allows Mr. Death to get further under her. NOW who's winning the pushing battle? But Black Panther, eager to get more done here, is back on the attack, and crashes into Mr. Death's now exposed side panel. He gets under, quite the feat considering Mobile Failure is on top of Mr. Death pretty much, and tries to axe them. Well he just axed Mobile Failure's wedge instead! It does hardly anything though, so Tracy is okay. Alex tries to gain a bit more leverage by hoisting Mr. Death up, but he doesn't have the leverage nor the power and Black Panther tilts himself up a bit, and lands about half a foot away, allowing Mr. Death to back off and come back in to attack Black Panther instead! Alex waits for playzooki to get near and then fires the axe, but the Ti/V skirt takes it like a champ. Mr. Death manages to get in there and underneath Black Panther before the latter can move away, but he wasn't expecting Mobile Failure to roar in from the side! Fortunately the other side skirt remaining defeats Mobile Failure's wedge and she slides up it. Mr. Death happily shoves Black Panther towards one of the house robots, and that would be Teresa, our nutty nun. Black Panther isn't keen on making friends and fires the axe again, and shakes himself off to the front-right of Mr. Death. playzooki re-wedges him, but his line-up with the house robot is broken... what's more, Mobile Failure is continuing to pursue! WHACK goes the axe on Mr. Death's rear skirt, but again doing little than aggravating the brick. Mr. Death shoves Black Panther against the wall, but can't really do much more than that, so it backs into Mobile Failure... and the exact same thing happens. Mobile Failure fails to get under Mr. Death but wedges up into the flat rear panel and pushes against it. Black Panther gets away and gets to the skirted side of Mr. Death as the playzooki machine is pushed into the wall, and begins to pummel it. It's not really doing much damage, but it is scoring aggression points for Black Panther. Oh, hold the phone here!! Black Panther just struck one of Mr. Death's exposed tires!!! And that is a great puncture!! AND AGAIN!! The wheel is surely destroyed!! And Black Panther continues to attack that same wheel! It's gone! It's outta there!! And now 30 seconds have passed... Mobile Failure, let him go!


As Mobile Failure backs the hell off, Mr. Death moves off in a wide arc, the back left wheel completely hosed! The axebots seem to have teamed up on him, and with only 3 wheels left, the situation is even more dire! Mobile Failure moves back again, again dismally failint to get under Mr. Death, but shoves against the flat panel. Black Panther continues to wail on Mr. Death, but Mr. Death moves away and attacks Black Panther! Only he missed! Black Panther is treated to the unskirted side, and gets right under! Without any Mobile Failure on top of the grim reaper, Alex now has more than enough power to hoist Mr. Death into the air! Mobile Failure gets to the other side and now it's an axe party! Whacka whacka indeed. But still, the 6mm Ti/V shell of Mr. Death holds firm! But 30 seconds of TWO robots hacking away at you with powerful axes can't be good for the insides! Or points, for that matter, should it go the distance! But as the axebots have to back off, it becomes evident that Mr. Death is now totally immobile, having taken too much rattling from the axes! It seems the rest of the robot was nowhere near as resilient as the body armour! Tracy and Alex high-five as playzooki looks on sadly, watching the referee robot move in to have his say. And he says:
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10!


CEASE!


Mr. Death and Last Rites are delivered a fitting eulogy - by deep impact! The axes of justice, Mobile Failure 2.5 and Black Panther, advance to Round 2!


Next: Coldforge vs. Creature From Black Lagoon vs. Cryoseism vs. Killotine: EVO