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Type properly (punctuation), it makes it look much more pro, and will give the reader a better idea of the mood and the way things are said, for example.
This: so what he hit me so i hit him back what do you expect
And this: So what?! He hit me, so I hit him back! What do you expect?
...(it sounds like I'm being mean, I'm not, just trying to help :uhoh:)
By the way, I'm loving this so far, keep them coming!
Am I right in thinking you're writing these in the box that you use to post?
If so you should really write your story in a word processor so it can (try to) advise you on punctuation etc. then copy and paste the chapter into the box.
chapter 6: 1st battle
At the front of the Battlebots army was War Machine. Leading his troops into battle.
Haha said War Machine triumphantly. Give up now. And your life will be spared.
Is this what you want. shouted Hazard with disgust. The end of people who are close to you. Look at Sgt Behemoth. I barley know him. And its as if hes my friend
Silence. said War Machine. Now my loyal Battlebots. Attack!!
The Battlebots charged in earnest. The uk bots held their ground. Behemoth became locked in deadly combat with
T-Minus. Throwing each other clear into the air as Mortis power slammed The Judge repeatedly with his axe and the Judge held his ground and slammed a few blows in.
Ambassador Chaos 2 dashed out the door. Sending middleweights this way and that.
Take that you driods of darkness.
Hammer Time try to fend of War Machine. He held up well. But was at last turned over and ran out of c02.
But luckily Behemoth self righted him. But the battle ended with death for Battlebots as many died for them.
But Hammer Time had the worst impact as Ripper was killed.
Retreat. Screamed War Machine.
They fell back and the uk bots celebrated We did it Hammer Time Shouted o.i.d hammer time.
With his dying breath. Ripper said to Hammer Time avenge me.
Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo Screamed hammer time and hid inside.
If you're talking about team ripper's hammer time then I'm pretty sure it's an electric hammer so it can't run out of gas.
yes i am and i didnt know it was electric but oh well its pneumatic now
Oh, by the way, my robot is American, so it could be considered a Battlebot.
i have a suprise instore
I agree with the thought you're better of writing these chapters in Word, where its easier to use the correct punctuation. The lack of that is really hurting this story, but apart from the story itself seems fine.
sorry but my laptop dont have word i need to pay for it :oops: